Saltwater

Animal Rightists Responsible for the Death of Millions of Redfish, Squid, and Crabs?

Could it be possible that an animal rights organization is responsible for the deaths of more fish than it saves, despite it’s alleged kill-nothing ethos? While fishing for yellowfin tuna a short while back, we discovered proof that despite their hand-wringing and knee-jerk protectionism, these animal rightists are actually killing countless sea creatures.

Look at all the helpless squid this nasty yellowfin tuna killed! It’s absolute carnage!

We bagged the yellowfin tuna you see in the picture here, along with three others, and as usual we gutted and bled the fish upon landing them. By gutting the fish and stuffing the body cavities with ice, they chill quickly and you get the highest possible quality meat. But when we opened the fish up, imagine our surprise as dozens of small squid poured out of the fish’s gut. You see, this mean, nasty yellowfin had for some reason seen fit to kill all those helpless little squid by jamming them into its stomach. In fact, we counted a total of 57 squid, three flying fish, and several unidentifiable goo-balls that were almost certainly once living creatures, inside of these vicious tunas. Just imagine – these murdered creatures represented a single day’s worth of carnage on the part of these four yellowfin tuna.

It doesn’t take much math to determine that by hooking, gaffing, and eliminating these four fish from the ocean, we saved the lives of approximately 20,805 squid, 1,095 flying fish, and another 1,000 or so other creatures, over the course of the next year. And yet these groups constantly tell us to eat vegan meals and not sea creatures. Do they give a hoot about those countless cuddly critters the tuna are killing? And, what about all the baby redfish being eaten by doormat flounder? Or the crabs and shrimp being cruelly ingested by speckled trout? Yet by their account, we should stop defending all those helpless lives and instead leave the heartless predators alone to do their damage.

How many people have these groups intimidated, interrupted, and otherwise influenced against fishing? For each and every one, the organization is probably responsible for killing tens of thousands of smaller, defenseless creatures that the fish those people would have caught eventually ate. We hope that each and every angler reading this will do their part to save the world from the likes of animal rights activists, by removing predatory fish – the tastier the better – from the environment.

Lenny Rudow

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